Thursday, July 15, 2010
The main character of the movie "Office Space" says at one point ~ "Every day get's a little bit worse, so basically every day that you see me, that's the worst day of my life." Well I rebuke that, shake it up, and turn it around to say that every day I walk a little closer to God, and therefore, today is always the best day of my life! Yeeeaaaaahhhhh! That is so awesome! Wow, what a way to look at this thing called life and more importantly, our walk with our Father. Every step I take toward Him is one more step away from the ways of our past and the ways of this world. To wake up every day, knowing it is the best day of my life. And no matter what the day may bring, it remains the best day of my life thus far because I know my Father better today then I did yesterday. And each step I take is easier than the last. He truly directs my footsteps. The more I listen, the louder He speaks and the more I see His hand at work in my life and the lives around me.
The way He designed this whole thing absolutely blows my mind. I don't believe that we are capable of completely or truly grasping His ways, as intricate and interwoven as they are. And that used to frustrate me. I needed to know. I had to understand why? I had to question it all. But the fuller I become with His love, the less I question and the more I see that I don't need to know...and what I do need to know, He'll show me, in His timing, in His gentle way. This eradicates fear. Fear of the unknown. Because what I don't know won't kill me, as I am saved by the one I do know! His love trumps all.
And I was told something last night by dear friends, that hit home and reminded me to see what He sees ~ He thinks I'm perfect just as I am and His love for me does not change depending on what I do. Anyone here on Earth do that for you? I don't know of anyone, but if you do, please give them my name, cause I'd like to meet them! Just let that gravitate for a minute - He loves me no matter what, and already sees perfection in me. If only we were all to see ourselves and each other with those eyes and heart.
I am ready to take His ways further and deeper. I know I keep saying this, but please understand that every day, while I am taking steps forward, I also tend to stumble back quite a few. But ultimately, my motion is forward, and that is what matters. Actually, I could stand still for the rest of my life, and He would love me. So what truly matters for this life is that I learn to accept, return, and grow in that love. I have no desire to stand still with my time here on Earth, which you can probably tell from this post, cause I'm all over the place! Sorry, but this is what happens. He overwhelms and I can't type fast enough to completely explain every bit of it.
I just know that it's becomming a masterpiece of His, this canvas I have become, wanting Him to paint His ways all over it. I just resisted typing that I am a blank canvas because I feel I am not blank, but rather too drawn on by this world. So maybe it's better to picture my Father with an eraser in one hand, cleaning up the ugliness, while in the other hand is a paintbrush dripping with the most magnificent colors the mind can imagine, and He is artfully swiping it all over my heart. Hmmmm, there's some imagery for you visual thinkers. Wow, I just love it when you do this God. When you just have your way and it flows out of me as though I am a faucet pouring water. You bring such joy to my heart. And peace. Beautiful peace. You are my everything and I thank you for your presence in this heart that was once so broken and chipped and bruised and damaged. Now there is such light, such light...such light and glory. Your glory. May it dwell here forever. Amen.