Help Please!!! Donations Needed!!!

Hello to my friends and family! My family and I have been talking seriously about helping a person or family in need this season, and that opportunity has presented itself to us this past week. Wednesday evening as I left work I saw a woman walking up the street and I stopped and asked if she needed a ride. She happily replied yes and got in the car. It was immediately evident that this woman is mentally challenged ~ and very sweet! So she directed me to her home, not more than a few blocks from where I work in Malvern. She lived in an apartment above a rug store. She was very grateful as I dropped her off and I went on my way home.

The next morning I was driving down the same street heading to the bank, and the building where this woman lived was completely charred and burned out. Apparently there was a very bad fire in the building that destroyed all of the apartments and the company below it. I'm not going to lie - my heart stopped when I saw this. Ok God ~ I'm listening! But I didn't even know the woman's name, so after contacting the fire department, police department, and finally the company that employs her, I have more details. Her name, I am told, is Mai Chow, and she has lost everything. All of her clothes and belongings were lost in this fire. As were those of the other 5 residents who lived in the apartments. Mai Chow's only family is a sister whom they have not been able to contact as of this morning. Her and her roommate have been given temporary housing for approximately 2 weeks, but have no clothes, no coat, no shoes, nothing.

So, it is now my very strong intention to help this woman and the others affected by the fire, in any way possible. They are in need of everything! Hence this e-mail to all of the giving souls I know! I am calling for a massive response from all of you wonderful people who love to give ~ and what better time than right now! We all know how cold it is outside, and we all know that there are so many who are less fortunate than we are ~ now we have the opportunity to truly help someone who couldn't need it more. Imagine that you are mentally challenged and were just involved in a fire where people had to be rescued from the roof because the flames were so bad. Imagine that you are left with nothing. Nothing! Now, look around your home and imagine what you could do without. How about that blanket that has been sitting in the closet for a year? And those shoes you haven't worn for 2 years? What's that - you have a set of kitchen utensils you don't use anymore? And the microwave that's sitting in your basement? I am willing to bet that every one of you have at least one item in your home that you could give in order to create a new home for someone who truly needs it. I'm not asking for money, unless you want to give that too. But there is a simple way to help that won't cost you anything.

I am collecting items starting right now. I will come pick them up from you, or you can drop them off to me at my home. Either way, please figure out a way to help these people. I will remain in contact with Mai Chow's employer, as they have set up a person to coordinate all donations for the people affected. They are also reaching out to find permanent homes for Mai Chow and her roommate. So please - take a minute to think of one thing you could donate. And pass this e-mail on to anyone you can think of that would be willing to help. I know what awesome friends and family I have, and I wouldn't ask for your help if it weren't necessary. But this is a fantastic opportunity to see the true meaning of Christmas come to life ~ so join me and let's reach one of the hurting!


Ok, you can e-mail me or call me at (484)798-4078 to make arrangements. I really appreciate your help and your response here. And you can read about the fire on the front cover of today's Daily Local News, or here:



I love you all very much and am grateful already for the outpouring of love that I see happening for this precious soul named Mai Chow. HUGS!!!!

Alicia

Where Are You Looking?

Why do we look everywhere else for the comforting of our souls? Why is it our natural reaction to search elsewhere? We wait for a glance from "that" man, to say it's ok ~ you are loved. We seek the affection that we just know will fill our needs which seem to strangle us with every breath. We base our self-worth on what others say, even though we know that others view us through their own barrage of self-doubt. We are so eager to play the victim because then we have a reason. Why do we so easily give away that which He holds dearest?

These are my thoughts of late. I am becoming ever~more aware of just how often I turn away from Him to find the satisfaction of my soul. But it ain't workin!!! While I don't necessarily understand why I do this, I am seeing how painfully obvious it is that it does not work! There is not one example I can give you to support looking to others, or even ourselves, for the desires of our heart. That's because ultimately we are designed to need and receive this from one source only. Only ONE is capable of truly loving and satisfying our souls in the ways we were created to need. Pretty smart dear Father! Pretty smart! You got that one right on! It's masterful when you consider the depth to this one single design that rules the majority of our behavior. He created us to need Him. That nothing else shall satisfy the deepest cravings of our souls. Nothing.



And I'll bet that many of you know this. I know this. I KNOW THIS! Yet, there I go...looking to my husband...looking to my children...looking to the stranger I pass on the street...looking to myself. We need validation. We need to know we are loved. We need to know we matter. From what I witness daily, I can comfortably, and sadly, conclude that everyone is searching for this. All of the people in your life need these same things. Not only do they need it, but we go to great lengths of destroying ourselves to capture love and validation from others. If you look very closely, you can see lost souls walking around everywhere, asking "Do I matter?" So tell me this dear one ~ do you think they are capable of giving it to you? How would they possibly be able to provide you with something they can't grasp for themselves? And even if they could, would it truly satisfy? I think not. I know not. In my heart, I know not.


God is the only true lover of our souls. He who created the heavens and the earth, and everything in between, created our souls to crave Him. It is truth. It is inescapable. It will remain this way regardless of our attempts to look elsewhere. Only He can satisfy because only He knows the depths of our beings. While some of you may think, "Oh great, one more thing I'm doing wrong!", let me put a spin on this that may comfort. He designed us to need that which there is a solution for. Take a minute with that one because He just smacked me over the heart with it too! Let's say it again...He designed us to need that which there is a solution for. He's already provided the answer to our soul searching ways. HE IS THE ANSWER! Aaahhhhh! Do you get it? We are all searching so desperately, scouring the earth, to know that we matter. But it is all for naught. We have the ability to go straight to the source! And I will stake my life that He will tell you that you matter. HE CREATED YOU! OF COURSE YOU MATTER!!! You matter. The author of every life thinks YOU matter. He who orchestrates the rising of the sun and moon every day. He who created vast oceans and delicate flowers and sheer beauty. He thinks your life was worthy of creating ~ and He already knows all the ways you'll screw it up! But you were still worth creating. He loves you that much!!!!!!

I matter.
I am loved.
I breathe because I was created.
I was created because I am loved.


Do you know these things too? Is your soul resonating with what I'm speaking? Regardless of how many years you have searched elsewhere ~ I'm guessing that you just heard the truth and you know it with every ounce of your being. As much as you may want to cling to the idea that you are not loveable or loved ~ God just came in and did what He does. He spoke truth into your heart. Truth that you are absolutely lovely ~ we all are. We all matter!!!!!!




Oh Father ~ that the depth of what you just spoke into my being will ring true for eternity. That I might know this as truth over that which I have falsely held as truth in my soul. I matter. I am loved. I am lovely. Lord I shall not question your design in me. I trust that your purpose for me existing is greater than any validation I might receive from elsewhere. There are no words to express what you've just infused into my heart. How could I possibly doubt what you have spoken here? There is no sufficient praise to thank you for your mercy, your grace, and your love. How perfect your ways. Let me forever look to you and know that I am love. Thank you sweet Papa. Thank you.

Go on and be blessed please. Turn to Him ~ the true lover of our souls ~ and know that you are loved. No matter what, you matter. So much love to all who read this! May your hearts understand the magnitude of His design. You are His design and for that alone I love you. Huge hugs!!!!

My Littles

My love for my children abounds. Finally. The truth of my love for these two beings who came from my very own womb is finally being discovered and embraced. This is not to say I haven't always loved them, because I did...to the best of my ability to love. But we aren't fully capable of loving others until we know the love of God. And I do. And His love goes forth from my healing heart, flowing into those who I've desired to love for so long, but wasn't able to, fully. To truly love another being with the love that is given to you by our Father will change your soul in the exact way it's meant to. And a mother's love for her littles is nothing short of God's truest intention for love.

But while this love for our offspring is beautiful and overwhelming and staggering, it can also bring fear and guilt that will literally stop your heart. The opening and healing of your heart allows you to see beyond yourself and sometimes that can be somewhat devastating...to see the damage you've done, the pain you've heaped, the brokeness you've passed along...to those dearest to your heart. And while feeling God's love opens you to love, it also opens you to much deeper feelings of the entire range He gave us to feel. And feeling true despair over the damage done to your very own innocent children, well that's something that could push you right over the edge.



Don't jump yet though, because it is at that very edge where God comes in and holds our hand, standing next to us, and asks you to trust Him even further. It is here where you can see His love for them...just as He loves you and has healed you...He is capable of healing them. But He had to do His work in you first ~ breaking that generational sin (Can I get a Hallelujah!!!).


And now He will guide me to shower the love over those littles that they have been deserving since they were thought into creation. Can I just tell you how I plan to rock out loving them? This love will know no bounds and will be shown in every way possible, and in some ways not known to be possible. Look out my little ones ~ this Mommas heart is ready to be shared and will infuse itself to yours, so that you WILL know the love of God and the life that He has designed just for YOU! You will be shown the truth of how perfectly fantastic you are and all of the wonderfulness that exists within you, this I promise my son and daughter. This I promise. We will walk this Earth together, hand in hand, knowing the amazingness of what He has created in each of us and the goodness He has in store for us. I can feel the love swirling and Daddy is whispering that this is what He has intended all along...and it's going to be ok. We are all just as He intended. Step off that ledge and let's fly together dear ones!






Mmm, I love how He loves us and that I can freely and without reserve entrust the lives of my children to Him and know that His plans for them far exceed any wild-haired idea I may wish for their lives. It is through Him that we each will heal and go out into the world and breathe His love and life. As lights on a hill that cannot and will not be hidden. We're going to shine baby, shine!!!




And on that note, I have to share a post that encourages me and reminds me to live out Shakespeare's words of "To Thine Own Self Be True" ~ know who God has created in you and embrace that being. I can't wait to show my littles how to rock out who they are because I think they are amazing and the world wouldn't be the same without their precious souls! You can read that post here (and yes I definitely stole the next song from her blog, but I'm sure she won't mind because she rocks like that and would appreciate me sharing an awesome song with all of you!)


I want to leave you with these thoughts my lovelies ~ whether it be your children, your parents, your brother or sister, your friend, your neighbor, or the lonely soul you pass on the street, or even the lonely soul you may see in the mirror when you dare to look ~ LOVE THESE PEOPLE!!! Please, find some way to love these people. Whether it be a huge abounding love or a small gesture that says you care ~ find a way to intentionally love someone this weekend, if only because our Father loves you!!! It is only through the lifting of my sisters in Christ that I am able to share these words with you this morning ~ and now I will give back. Please do the same!


Ok, so much love coming at all of you this beautiful fall God-inspired day! Hugs, kisses and all that jazz from a girl who just loves to love!!! Have a beautiful and glorious weekend my dears ~ you are very loved! Check ya later skaters!!!

The Letter of My Life

Hmmm, where to even begin. Can it possibly be written? I've asked before, but are there words that properly match the voice of our hearts? And even if there are, do they come anywhere close to expressing His love? My guess is no because at this point all I can do is hope my heart doesn't explode with His love. So, here's to hoping because I have been waiting to write this for two days now and I can only imagine what the recounting will do to strengthen further what He has done in this soul and many others over the past 4 days. Even as I begin to conjure up the ways to tell it, He is loving all over me and I could die today knowing He is for me...and you...and His love is ALL that matters. Not one other thing or person or being comes close to His love. I truly now grasp the meaning of the word GENUINE. His love for us is absolutely GENUINE and perfect and all-encompassing.

I think the best way for me to share the events of the past few days would be in the form of a letter to the orchestrator of these grace-filled days. So, here we go!

My Dearest Abba Father,

My heart overflows, and you know this. What you have completed in me in one weekend has brought together 31 years of life and given those years purpose. I realize now that this is what I have been missing all this time ~ completely knowing and accepting your love. Not that your love has changed, but my heart is now restored to you and can fully feel your love, truly and overwhelmingly. I've said for years that my strength is rising as I wait on you, but I never realized it could be like this. That it's not about strength or anything I do. It is about letting your love flow through me in a way that shines for others to see and glorifies you all at the same time. I am a conduit for your love, which once understood and felt, flows out naturally into the world. How could it not? For surely I cannot possibly contain this awesome and amazing grace you have opened my heart to.



I see now that you had to spend the last several years gently picking up the broken pieces of this heart and discarding them. Those pieces were never meant to be there, but were heaped onto this heart by the brokenness of this world. And by your grace, I have taken those pieces and died to them, once and for all. They are no longer a part of my being, although you've allowed the memories to remain, lest it not be forgotten exactly what has been done with this life. Because that is how others will be helped to heal, just by simply hearing the amazing story you have made this life into. Your beauty eclipses all of the brokenness in one shining light.




This weekend a group of your children gathered in order to learn how to better rest in you. And that took on many forms and shapes just like anything good you give because of the perfect diversity you have created in each of our stories. And when we are all brought together in this way, it shines of your love! Laughter is felt, tears are shed, hands are held, hearts are molded, spirits are united, love is given and love is received, and you are at the very center of it all. It is so clear that every word spoken was ordained directly from your love for us. In order to break us even further, until we finally give in to your relentless pursuit, once and for all, realizing this is the moment you've been waiting for...for us to surrender completely and absolutely to your ways, so you can breathe the new life you so desire and seal yourself in our beings. Thank you for not relenting Father!


Bringing me to my knees, you showed me my old self, lying lifeless at the foot of the cross, distorted and broken. You held me as I wept over that life because that life was full of striving and a desire to be good, but it was a life of this world. After wracking sobs were wrenched from my gut to pay proper homage for this girl who had gotten so very lost, I was able to hear you say "it's ok to walk away...come with me now and I will show you the way." Your voice, Father, is clearly the reason angels sing.

I then watched as a small child with beautiful blonde locks and innocent, lovely blue eyes emerged from that broken and lifeless body to turn and run into your arms. Your embrace over her was endearing and freeing in a way that finally allows me to call you Daddy...something I've longed for in the depths of my soul. A redeeming Father who has the ability to restore the lost child. It was then that the beautiful momma you've placed at my side voiced all that you were showing me in my heart, confirming your visions and whispers over my life.


And from this brief moment in time ~ a mere 24 hours ~ healing flowed over your children who lavished love over one another, sharing and singing and holding and resting. Finally resting in the truth of your love and your peace and joy, resting in your essence and gifts and sovereignty, in the ability to properly worship you. Relinquishing control. Fully resting in you.

Papa, to say that you have restored my heart wouldn't even begin to explain your work. This heart is the heart you gave me when you first conceived the thought of me. This heart came directly from a piece of your own and I quiver at the thought of a heart shared with your mightiness. That I might be worthy to share this love you are showering over me. But I am worthy. You have fully equipped me to step into this new life and be the person you've been speaking to for quite some time now. My gratefulness is unutterable, but I know you hear the shouting of my heart in it's rejoicing and love for you. And the more you show me as a child, running in fields with you and finally reaching out for all that you have waiting, the more my heart beats in rhythm with yours. May they beat as one forever and ever.

It is in your beautiful son's name that I am able to sing these praises to you. It is in his name that I exist. Amen Daddy, Amen.

Float On

I haven't written lately because I fear that what I am saying isn't truth, that I am a hypocrite because I'm not exactly living what I speak. But as my kindred-spirit pointed out ~ our words have power and we must speak good into our lives. So, even if I'm not quite there yet, it's ok, because I'm proclaiming where I am headed. And every time I speak those words...that truth attaches itself to my soul and impacts my decisions, good or bad, in the future. So I am slowly, intentionally closing the gap between where I am and where God wants me. Boy is that a process! But looking back, I can't imagine if my steps hadn't taken the exact path they have..so I will continue to step forward, shakily but led by faith and a love for my Father! I will float on His love and let Him carry me.

God has also been helping me to just remain still and get quiet. Have you been still lately? Have you paid attention to that which flows from your mouth? If so ~ rock on! If not, I would encourage you to take a listen...to yourself. Is what flows coming from the heart? Can you listen without having to speak? Can you just be, without having to affirm that you are right or good or justified...just be? Can you float through your day, knowing you are loved?

Are you looking for the lovely in others? I was directed to do this for the next week by a woman who is trying to help me restore my marriage ~ God Bless Her (no really, God please Bless Her!). Our natural inclination is to focus on that which is wrong or lacking or negative, especially in others. Change your mind. Thinking on that which is lovely about my husband is much more uplifting than focusing on all that is wrong. And it allows me to be the obedient wife, regardless of what he does because I know that ultimately he is lovely and exactly who God created him to be ~ my husband. So while we both continue to mess up and fumble through this marriage that God has called us to (very clearly and loudly He called, I might add), I can see much brighter glimpses of the people that God is unveiling as He slowly and delicately works out the good for us, individually and as husband and wife. Rock on God, rock on! Help us float closer and closer!

Even if things end up a bit too heavy, we'll all float on alright, of this I'm becoming more and more sure. God is always here, with us, lifting us, guiding us, loving us. I'm preparing to go away with my church for the weekend to learn how to rest in Him and I really just feel the need to float on, trusting Him and allowing Him to carry me, no matter what. Sorry for the mad rambling and run-on sentences, but I'm choosing to let Him do the speaking and this is one of the awesome ways He works in me ~ rambling and bits and pieces that when strung together as a whole ~ He can be heard saying "Float on with me today Alicia!"


Alright then Daddy-O, let's float! Here's to all of you reading this ~ go get still, speak your truth, and look for the lovely...it's there, in abundance, I promise! Love you much and hoping you all take some time to float on His love this beautiful weekend! XOXOXOXOXOXO!!!!

That's Progress Baby!

I was up at 3:00 this morning, having an awesome conversation with our Father, who for some reason I'm sure only He knows, loves to wake me in the middle of the night for prayer and time to talk. Hmmm, it just occurred to me that it may mean I'm not giving Him enough time during the day. Ok, more on that in a later post. But for now I need to share what He shared. He told me that He is truly pleased with me, amongst many other things, but let's go with this one for today because it's just that good!

He is truly pleased with me! Oh yeah, that's right, uh huh! Ok, I may or may not be doing the jig right now (you'll never know ~ unless you know me, and that would mean that yes, yes I am doing the jig, because, well, that's what I do!) So at the very moment I feel that I am failing completely and irrevocably, the God of this Universe took the time to whisper that He loves me and He is truly pleased with me. I would be lying if I said I wasn't shocked. That whisper made my heart jump! How can YOU be pleased with me? I complain, I stagger backwards with every step I take, I get angry, I am sad, and I sin. And that was just this morning! Not really, but on any given day pick three from the above list and you'd be correct! But here's where He got me. He said,

"But look at where you began, then look at where you are now. And know that I was pleased with you where you began...just as I am truly pleased with you now. Because I knew where you would begin, and I knew that you would get to here, so why would I not be pleased? There is beauty in all of it and it was all in my plan. You are my plan."

I realized then, and even more-so today that I constantly look at where I'm not ~ instead of how far I've grown. I see what I don't have ~ not the bountiful blessings that surround us with every breath that enters our lungs. I see all that I am not ~ instead of seeing what He see's ~ a perfect creation who is exactly who she was made to be at this moment in time. I see the steps I take backward ~ not the HUGE steps taken forward. All in all, I am not giving myself enough credit. I am not celebrating the deeper relationship I now have with my Father, which has slowly changed me in MANY ways! Looking back I realize that the changes have been huge! And while it took me almost 30 years to do the damage, I need to give Him at least a few more years for perfection!

He also reminded me that when I look in the mirror and criticize, I am criticizing His creation. He made me beautiful ~ for eternity. Now, while getting out of bed this morning at 7am, after being up from 3 till mmmm, about 6:00 ~ I can tell you I might not have felt very beautiful at that moment! But upon prying my eyes open and splashing some cold water in my face, I was reminded of His words ~ I'm very beautiful to Him, inside and out. Who am I to question Him? Ok God, if you say so, I guess I'm beautiful (I say with a sheepish little grin).


The point is ~ it's ok. It's all ok, no matter what. If God is for you, who can be against you? And God is for me. God loves me, and that will never change ~ He will never forsake me. So no matter how I struggle in my marriage or with addictions or with patience or with finances or with... (you fill in the blank), it is ok. God is with me, God loves me, God will provide, and in Him there is such abundant joy to be found. His ways are not our ways, so while it is ok to question our lives (I actually encourage you to do so because "an unexamined life is not worth living" ~ Socrates), it is not ok to question the purpose of this life. Whether or not I deserve life or whether or not I want to be here ~ these are not up for examination. Because God has a purpose in each and every one of us, and He is very pleased with each of us, for one reason or another ~ a reason we may not even recognize! But He is pleased. God is pleased with me. Yeah, that's plenty for today, for this moment. Father you are enough...more than enough.

A Love Letter ~

Dearest Little Brother (who's not so little any more):

So you've made me an Aunt (again), and new life is always something to celebrate! But along with being a time to celebrate, it is also a time for reflection on this beautiful thing called life. While I can't stop looking at her beautiful pictures, I also can't stop thinking about what her life will mean to you and your crazy awesome wife. Your lives have been completely and unutterably altered, from this point on. You will forever feel that a piece of you is now living and breathing outside of your beings. You will know what it means to truly worry over a cough. You will feel love in a way that you would have never known, had she not been a part of this world. She will cause worry and tears and doubt and fear...along with beauty and laughter and unimaginable joy and peace...knowing that God has given her to only you, and you to her, because He loves all three of you THAT MUCH! Oh, how he must love us ~ to give us the incredible ability to create an entirely separate being from that which makes us who we are. How can you not gaze at her and see God's love for us?

It is in her fingers ~ tiny and perfect. Her sweet cherub lips that are pink and precious! Her face that would melt the hardest of hearts! Pure beauty and loveliness! What's even lovelier is hearing in your voice something that wasn't there before ~ a sense of caring more for someone else than you've ever cared before. An awe of the grace of our Creator ~ that you might be blessed in this way. Let that awe stick little brother ~ forever and ever, please. Because this new walk is one that will take a lifetime, and even then, you still won't be capable of grasping what a huge gift your daughter's life is. That God chose her just for you and has awesomely amazing plans for your family! You so enjoyed giving her her first bath that I can only imagine the day she walks, talks, gets married, and has a child of her own (and trust me ~ it will happen that quickly!)! How proud and overwhelmed with joy I am for you. She is surely going to change your life, even more than she already has and I beg that you dive deep into that change and enjoy every moment of being a father to such a blessed baby girl! Always remember that she is a gift, who is meant to walk this Earth with a purpose and a way all her own ~ specially gifted by our Father and protected by His love that will carry her through life, with your help!



Along with, of course, the help of your beautiful wife whom I love as a sister! Girl ~ you delight my heart in a million ways! You are strong and courageous and kind and lovely, and an incredible mother, this I know already! And the perfect woman for my brother ~ may he hold onto you forever! What a beautiful family you both have created ~ be sure to always keep God at the center of it and to always remember the importance of your marriage! Without the happiness of Mommy and Daddy, there's not much to go on for any of you! So brother ~ make sure to take your gorgeous wife out on a date every once in a while and revere her for the ability to give life ~ your daughters life. And bring her flowers ~ if I remember correctly she's a stickler for roses ~ fill your home with them just because you love her that much.

My heart spills over with love for you and your family in ways I can't describe! And while it saddens me greatly that I cannot be there to share in this momentous time with you and yours ~ please know that I am there fully in spirit ~ thinking of all 3 of you constantly and praying for each of you deeply. We may not be close in terms of miles, but your place in my heart will never be moved or changed - ours is a bond that will last for eternity & I thank God for blessing me with you, and now your beautiful family. It's just sooo good! I love you endlessly and will always be your big sister, even though you have a little one of your own now and aren't so little yourself any more! And remember that your daughter has two cousins who are dying to hold her and just love all over her! They're pretty good at that ;) Much, much love and all that's good being sent your way little brother! Can you feel me hugging you right now? Cause I am, always!!! Congratulations and blessings over your family! And Momma ~ just keep doing what you do because it's all good and you inspire! And precious baby girl ~ you have an Aunt who will love you forever and can't wait to get her hands on you and kiss you all over and eat you up! In just that order! Love you child whom I have yet to meet but is already a piece of my heart!


Love you all so very, very much! xoxoxoxo